Do you know who your Aunt Lys is?
04/22/2003
12:46 a.m.
My little sister had an abortion last week. She's twenty and already the mother of a 2-year-old. When I found out she was pregnant again, I asked her if she knew where babies came from. It was sarcastic and a little mean, I know, but that's how I deal with big life-altering situations like this. I've always been pro-choice. I was all about that damn woman's right to do what she will with her own body. I still am. Except now I have a nephew. The closest thing to a soulmate that I've ever known(If you've thought that "soulmate status" was reserved only for spouse's and significant others, you were wrong), and I can't imagine my life without him. He's the reason I've yet to leave my hometown to expand my career. This is hard. Every time I look at her belly, I think that there could've be another Soulmate in there. Now there's not. Last night I went to visit them for supper. As he fed me a piece of his hot dog with that smile of delight on his face, my heart began to hurt. I keep a picture of us taped to my computer at work. He's less than a day old, and I'm holding him, smiling at the camera. He's staring directly at me. Less than a day old, and he knows who his Aunt Lys is. When I come over, he runs around the house making sure everyone knows that I've arrived. He used to cry when I left, and I would cry with him. He calls on a regular basis, often leaving messages on my answering machine at home. "Come see me" is usually the theme. I offered to adopt the baby. I wasn't sure if I was ready for something like that, but I was willing to try. I was turned down. My sister and mother felt that it would be too weird. My sister wouldn't give the baby up because it would be too difficult for her knowing that her child was out there somewhere. Here's where text doesn't do justice. You can't hear the sarcasm in my voice. I find it funny that it would be more difficult to let the baby live with someone else than live at all. I think I've had to be the emotional support for everyone else for too long. I didn't know I was this upset. I didn't know I hurt this much. I didn't know how much I wanted to cry. I didn't know I was this pissed off. Damn woman's right to choose.
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� Lysistrata 2003-2004
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