If You'll Just Smile...
02/13/2004
5:27 p.m.
Y'know how I had my Anti-Super Bowl Party last year? No? Well, here. Go read about it. I'll wait. . . . . . . . . Are you back yet? Lord, you read slow. Anyway, by popular request, I had another party this year. And, like last year, the local media was interested in it. 'Cept this time, it was the TV station. Now I know what you're gonna say. Hey! You work for the television station!! You greased some palms, didn't you? And you know what I would say to that? Yeah. It's a perk. So deal with it. So, I cooked some chili this time around, had some more people over, and got interviewed and put on camera. In fact, our affiliate was the one broadcasting the Super Bowl so I'm sure many people gots to see my pre-swollen, all-teeth-accounted-for, smiling mug. Now, next year, to make things even better, I plan on having a live radio broadcast from my house. Hey, if I'm going to conquer the media with my party planning ways, I gotta get every form of media in there. And speaking of swollen mugs... ************************************My God! When they tell you there's going to be some swelling, they aren't kidding!!
Look at that sucker! It's huge!! It's amazing that I can get a shirt over my head. Well, on the bright side, this new oral surgeon was one hot doctor. And he gives goooooood nitrous oxide. I hardly remember jack squat about the whole procedure- a much appreciated change from the last time I had teeth removed. I was sick and so stuffed up that I couldn't inhale any of the gas so I was very awake the entire time. Plus, the guy had me sitting straight up! How are you supposed to relax when you're trying to keep from falling out of a chair? But this doctor? Oh, he had my chair all laid back, nice and comfy. The light rock music was playing on the speaker, and I just drifted off to sleep. I couldn't believe it when I opened my eyes, and they were stitching me up. I'm fairly certain I asked the assistant about 10 times if they were really done. ************************************BTW, just kidding. That's a picture of Eric St0lz from the movie Mask. 
But I'll tell you what. It was gettin' pretty close to that. I've had several people keep asking me if I still have gauze stuck in my cheeks. Happy Valentine's Day, Folks.
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� Lysistrata 2003-2004
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